So today I got a call from one of the girls at work who is out on medical leave. Turns out she'll be out for 6-8 additional weeks. She wasn't a great employee and she didn't retain training well. I think it's time to cut her ties. The thing is that I feel a little bad about it. Not because she was a good employee but because she was a good person. And again... I have guilt.
At the same time today is my best employee's birthday. In the last year she has went from helpful to absolutely necessary for day to day office function. I see her struggling along side me to pick up the slack from being two people understaffed and I'm proud of her. I want to do right by her. I want to get her some help before I'm out on maternity leave. And again, I have guilt.
My guilt lies in my own perception. I think I can make a plan and it will happen. When the plan stops working I feel guilty. When I feel guilty I make more plans...and then the circle continues.
Just once I'd like things to happen the easy way but, if they did, would I know what to do next...without my circle of guilt.
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