Saturday, February 28, 2009
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
I can relate to her need to have a spot all her own, things that no one else touchs or gets into. A place that is quiet and filled with comfort that you can feel surround you.
Mostly I find mine in books.
Which is good because it's easier to wrap myself in words than it is to try and squeeze myself under my bed.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
For the record. Layla also has my bizarre color changing eyes. They are a trait we both inherited from my Grandma Gerty.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
I'm not just saying that because the baby learned that without socks on age can climb almost anything in our house.
She's walking the back of the couch like a mountain goat, dancing on tables like a wild yeti, and causing havock by climbing every box and gate we own.
Monday, February 16, 2009
I need to finish scrapbooking the babies first year scrapbook. I need to type a few more chapters. I need to file our taxes. I need to find my extra digital camera from highschool. I really need to locate my/Jon's birth certificates that went AWOL after the move.
But, instead I find myself doing the same thing day in and day out. Go to work, feed the kid, read a little, go to bed, get up & start over. Then the weekend comes and it's a scramble of back logged cleaning, dishes and chores. I feel like I'm never going to catch back up.
I know in 10 years I'll look back at the things I'm struggling with now and I'll long for them instead of whatever I'm going to be struggling with then. "The good ole days" every one falls victim to it eventually. What I don't know is how I focus on remembering that today is a good day when sometimes it just feels a little overwhelming.
And, it shouldn't be overwhelming. I've just lost some of my support net, some of my village is overwhelmed with their own issues. I'm trying to be there for them but I find myself wondering what it would be like to not have to always be dealing with Drama... you know like I did "back in the good old days".
I suppose that's why I blog. So 10 years from now I can look back at the "good ole days" and remember that during this chapter of my life there were struggles...and that I got past them. This blog will serve witness.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
As far as valentine's go... it was pretty good for the plastic commercial heart holiday. There was upset, laughter, and later a black eye... but there was cake... everything is better with cake.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
I recently purchased her Easter basket so the bunny could get started filling it a little with each paycheck. It's a lot smaller than this basket. I hope she won't be disappointed when she can't sit in hers.
But, the best thing about Garratt, is that he'll probably forgive me when he finds out I posted this pictures on the INTERNET!!
Happy Belated Birthday!
Thursday, February 12, 2009
- Lock herself in rooms
- Say yes to any question where the answer isn't obviously no
- Climb on to the side table in the living room
- Climb on to the kitchen table
- Climb across her book case
- Climb on to the big beds
- Count to 3 (always) and 4 (sometimes) and 6 (rarely) but never on command
- Find and say the letter J in her alphabet book
- Run without going sideways
- Call Nana on my phone despite it not working correctly for me
- Open a sippy cup lid
- Put on her left shoe
- Pull her own shirt off
- Drop an F bomb when she broke something
- Ask for specific movies and then mimic them on TV
- Dance like Daddy
- Dance like Mommy
- Sing two new songs, making the list now...Wheels on the Bus, Itsy Bitsy Spider, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Prince Ali (from Aladdin) and Route 66/Life Could be a Dream (from Cars)
- Drink from a cup without a straw
- Properly eat yogurt with a spoon
- Hide things from us based on size... (flat things under things, round things in things, etc)
- Identify the color blue, pink and NOT blue (otherwise known as any color other than blue or pink)
- Correctly use keys
- Not perform any of the above mentioned things on demand but only when the mood strikes her and it will get her the most attention.
The virus was wimpy so it didn't hurt my PC but it killed my phone. The phone started eating any message that I sent out, most messages that I recieved via text, etc...
It was tragic
But, my phone is under warranty and it was supposed to have virus protection... so now two days after I made my complaint to AT & T wireless the nice people at Blackberry have sent me a cranberry red pearle just like my last one...
Minus a virus.
Jon is currently putting my myspace back on my phone and thanks to the Blackberry back up on my PC from the 10th, I only lost whatever messages I received (and didn't notice missing) since last Thursday.
It even kept my bookmarks for the internet.
I love this phone.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Maybe it's PMS...afterall I haven't had a period in ... um... forever.
But it's probably more likely that it was the mess up at the electric company that got our power turned off when it shouldn't be and then the not nice man when I called to arrange my car payment for tomorrow. Maybe it was the massage I missed out on and the horrible dreams the full moon gave me last night.
Whatever it is... I hope I can sleep it off.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
My menstrual cycle is alive. Thank you, Jesus!
My new schedule is awfully early but my kid is awfully cute after work.
I heart fresh asparagus steamed with butter and sea salt.
The baby plays alone in her room now when she doesn't want to nap. By play, I mean that she destroys her room and laughs while she does it.
We might actually get a very very small tax return.
My FSA is finally set up and I should get the new card in the mail in about a week at which point I can finally go to the dentist.
Monday, February 09, 2009
It's beautiful to me how a child experiences joy. I love how when she feels joy it bubbles out of her in her laugh, her eyes, her posture and the light around her seems brighter and filled with hope. I love that when the spirit moves her she is open to the compulsion to do what feels happy. To dance, to sing, to clap, to run...
I love that she is alive with love. I love that she is a little light that is always shining. Twinkling even in the darkest moments... she is a sign of God's love, in both noun and verb form. She is the definition of new experiences, the example of whole hearted and the explaination for a life lived loudly and without real explaination.
Sunday, February 08, 2009
- Dig the Easter decorations out of the attic
- Clean out the closet under the stairs so it is usable not just a giant pile of junk.
- Clean out the two baskets in our closet
- Donate baby clothing to charity to get it out of our closets
- Re-organize the garage and get rid of things we don't need.
- MINIMIZE our collection of collections... do we really need all this stuff??
Doesn't that sound like fun?
Today I'm airing out the house and getting some much needed posting lined up on my food blog. I also posted baby pictures finally on Layla's blog and I think I'll make some cowboy cookies later this afternoon. I need to make one more trip to the grocery store and to take a shower with out a baby underfoot and shave my legs.
I'm super excited I start my new shift tomorrow. 6 am to 2:30 pm Monday to Friday for the month of February...then it changes again. That leaves weeks and afternoons with my Layla bug and hubby as well as plenty of time to go back to school.
So I'm going to go deal with the spring cleaning and when I'm done I'm going to get out my work clothes and get ready for tomorrow. Both of which seem much more important then finding a blog prompt right now when I can't think of anything to blog about.
Thursday, February 05, 2009
This week has been a busy week and I sort of wish I still had a little RRR on my calendar. That would be a nice change of pace. Time to look back at the week spent on the phones at the new job getting things done. A little more time to pray for the friend I can't call because my phone doesn't work and who hasn't written back to my emails because I know she's struggling. A little time to find a red shirt to wear to work tomorrow, figure out what's for dinner and rejoice in today's small victories (I won hockey tickets at work & I got a pretty good schedule bid finally).
Those are the sorts of things that seem to be tumbling around inside my head because I can't seem to nail them down to anything. I'm a bubble of repeating myself, losing my keys and going to bed entirely too early because I just want to.
Meanwhile, my daughter is pushing toddler boundaries, my husband is keeping the laundry done and my life keeps being it's normal spastic self. Tomorrow is another payday that will be gone just as soon as I get it and next week is another week of things to do.
But you know what? Now that I stopped to blog about it... it seems not so stressful. See I knew a little RRR would help.
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
he baby we thought we'd lose. The next year he gave me a get out of jail free card when I couldn't leave my daughter at home on Valentine's day. This year he gives me the gift of being a fabulous father who keeps me smiling and loves his daughter so very much.
I guess that's why I picked him to be my Valentine forever.
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
The fertility drugs they put me on make me feel tired and sickly. I don't remember that from last time but I got pregnant almost immediately last time so I might have blamed the baby. Working the new job is fun and it keeps me busy during work hours and then I come home to my little devil child.
Sunday, February 01, 2009
Some things are easy now that I'm used to it.
Last night we went out to dinner with other adults. Someone brought a kid the same age as mine. I floated through that unharmed...my one night out as an adult being kid friendly.
Then someone died that I didn't know but I watched the path of broken hearts it left behind and I prayed for them but I didn't stop in my tracks and have to recover my sanity.
There is clutter in the closet, pee on some sheets, and I broke a nail all before 8 am. No big deal.
Truth of the matter is, I'm getting my defenses back. I missed the confidence to be "ok" a lot while it was gone but I'm glad it's back now.
Money is still tight, but there is always hope. There is even talk about communal living that brings hope and joy to my heart (even if it doesn't work out I got to think about it and that's exciting). There is a job with a desk with a drawer. There is a babysitter who does more than she should for less money than she should. There are friends who call and stop by. There are babies coming (6 of them...none of them mine).
And God saw fit to give me my fertility perscription for free from my insurance. I think it's a sign. A sign that this year might actually be easier than the last one.