Saturday, November 07, 2009


When the Doctor told me to cut my stress level so I could get off the high risk list I thought, sure that will be easy. Within two weeks there was no more childcare, a death in the family and an overdrawn bank account that shouldn't have been overdrawn.
Oh well. I tried.
While the death hit me hardest the baby going off to school seems to have the most lingering sense of doom. In fact even today with the funeral in just a few hours I am more focused on whether or not I am scaring my child for life.

I know school is good for her. It's just the part where in 1 day she'll go from people she knows to strangers, with no cuddle cow, no comfort pillow, no pacifier and some random schedule that is run with military like discipline. We already broke her from sippy cups and I know we're ready to potty train so those things don't scare me...yet.
I swear to you now if they break my vibrant and full of life child I will never forgive myself.
In other news, the baby in my tummy decided to start moving while we were all at Pop's spinning our heads around the fact that Jeromy had passed on. He/she moves about once a day now that I can feel.
My work still hasn't released our bonuses to us so I still haven't done any holiday shopping. Thanks to yet another act of kindness from my mother there are now Layla 2 year old pictures in my livingroom though and they are ADORABLE so I know some of you will be getting those. (Which is why I didn't post them online yet)
I need to get my act together and get a family picture lined up and make Christmas cards, otherwise I might just skip them this year. Some things don't seem as important as they once were. Now that we're poor and we're about to have another baby... I'd rather you had a nice homemade batch of cookies then a picture card if I only have time for one.
Also, it's 19 days until Turkey Day. I am going to really miss the Thanksgiving Day parade now that I don't have cable. I haven't bought anything for that yet either but I have a menu plan and another good payday before it happens so that's not actually stressing me out for a change. My 11th turkey, it turns out will be the first one I didn't spend days wringing my hands over.
Ok...I could ramble on forever. Instead, I think I will go give my child a bath and take some bubble girl pictures so I have something to post on her site this week. (Other then the 1 picture with her Halloween cupcake, I have been a totally picture slacker)
As requested, I'll post my eulogy today after the funeral, which hopefully can end the death talk topic on this site for awhile because I could use a change.