Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Another Round with Mommy

So last night I call my mom to see if she has a place to live because I'm a good daughter. She calls me back to say "oops nevermind". She's staying with him. She's not even looking for a place to go. They've decided to get counciling and that he needs help because he might be manic. I could have told her that a year ago.

Now here in lies the drama part. Jon took off hours from work to help her move. She didn't even call us. I changed all my plans for the weekend. So now we have no plans and we're losing money because Jon gave away his shifts and she could care less. Drama.

No one likes to feel like they are being used. No one likes feeling like their family doesn't listen to their advice (I was in a similar situation once and staying was the dumbest thing I ever did). No one likes feeling like they don't matter. My mom. She's been making me feel all of those things more and more lately.

There is no nice way to tell someone that the reason you didn't go see your mother after she had surgery is because you think her family now is toxic and that she acts like someone totally different when she is around them. So I guess I'm not a nice person because the next time she asks I'm going to tell her the truth. Hopefully she won't ask.

So I pray. I pray every day that the Lord will stop this pull of evil on my heart. The pull towards doing what makes me feel safe and probably isn't a good way to love my mother. And I wait. I wait to know what he asks of me.

2 comments:

Lisa @ The Plain-Spoken Pen said...

I'm sorry about family stress. Amazing how the people we should be closest to can send us over the edge the fastest.

Cheryl said...

Family drama can be exhausting. I'd love to have one of those boring families where the only stress and scandal is having a baby out of wedlock. It looks like neither of us were blessed with such boredom. Oh well. I'll keep praying for you, dearheart.