This morning I woke up to rain coming into my bedroom window and hitting my in the face. I live in CA it is not supposed to rain on my face in April. We don't have April showers.
I laughed at the irony of the rainy day as I said my morning prayers in bed hitting the snooze button a few extra times. Last night was full impact. My roommate lost a dear friend in an accident. He was a police officer who was well loved and respected by his family, community and church. She took it very hard.
The night went calm as we eventually stopped talking about it and started watching American Idol and eating snap peas (I get the inside and she gets the outside) and I marveled at how much like a mom I am starting to feel. I was so prepared to be calm that it never crossed my mind to cry.
This morning, with the rain coming in the window, I wept a little... not for his flight to heaven, or for his family left behind but instead because I now know in my heart that he is in the grace of God and that made this the first death in a long time that didn't scare me out of living.
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Today I woke up with a sense of peace...the rain makes it hard for me to smile today, but I like to think of it as tears of joy from God. The Modesto Bee did an update...the Governor talked about Bob and ordered that the flags be lowered. I'm glad they are giving him such respect, he definitely deserves it. I think I'll wait one more day to talk to his wife, and ask the dept about a funeral.
That's so sad. You're all in my prayers.
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